Friday, December 31, 2010
Climbing the pleateu of 2011, Surfing the Monsoon
Pluto is opening up different paths of peril and transformation. Uranus helps me keeps my goals and purposes in mind.
The eclipsed moon is my rudder
The winter Solstice is the strength of the keel of my boat, my sun sign steers the boat and the residual Capricorn energy is the external of the boat to deal with the conformity of the Seas.
Going thru the gate I'm blessed with a Sagittarius moon ruled by Jupiter's faith. All guided by mercurial compass. Not long into 2011 we bump into our blessing the Eclipsed sun creating our mast and increasing the girth of my ship.
So my prayer into this new year I that my failing heath improve drastically , I
Also pray that my business Fabutron takes on a mass public appeal. Focusing to the eccentric. Chalk art side walk skits all geared around Woodstock (Micheal j,prince, boy George)
I plan on being more proactive and not so timid and frail . Allow myself to SHINE unabashed. And take full pride in my work.
All of these planets and positions at this time on the universal clock lends great energy to those that understand what the influences mean to them.
For the laymen it a stretch of understanding.
For the Amateur it becomes a leap of faith.
As for the mentor they lay out a path that beacons the brave to come forth and join the Universal Consciousness.
As legend would have it I proclaim that in six months my neatly and my book will get better. My outlook concerning success will Improve and my public appeal will have notoriety professionally. Income will become more noticeable and dreams will begin to manifest.
This all said under the finger of God. Like my Birthday the circle is complete.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Three Cops caught Joking with PERP at Donut Shop

Terrorism vs. Prop 19
Ladies and Gentlemen the story you are about to hear is true, the names have been changed to protect the innocent.
The day, the sun in Scorpio, November 5th, 2010. Time 1:20 am. The location , The Dunkin Donuts on Kings Bridge Avenue across from the Armory.
This is Dragnet 2010. I am Det. McMahon, Badge NYPD 514. This is the case of the Smiling PERP. The One that got away.
We were under a Scorpion New Moon this night. Under a new moon, You feel that the rules other people make are not for you, you make your own rules appropriate to the present moment. It is a time when the moon is going thru transformation and the evenings cast no shadow.
It is the Moons energy. that drives the tides in the Oceans and the 92% of water in man. It is that energy that ruled this night of Dark Irony brought on by the Scorpion nature. Remember Halloween falls under Scorpio. Get it...
On this night I’m enjoying my nightly cup of Joe at the Dunkin Donuts on Kings bridge Avenue in the Bronx. I’m a lone Wolf and into the shop walked these three Rookies (cubs), all from the 55th Precinct. They weren’t really rookies, they had some time in, but they were no old salt.
All three couldn’t be taller than 5’10’ , 5’11” the most.
There was Off. Mazerelli to the right of the counter. Mazerelli is a little vain, he keeps a dark thickly groomed coiffure. It’s the envy at the station.
There was Off. Braun. Braun was standing to the left of the counter. Officer Braun, wore his head shaved and was thickly muscled. He’s a boy that never misses a meal. He had the workhorse body that equaled Mazerelli’s looks.
And of course to end the trio was Officer Riggs. Riggs is a good cop. A cop that’s a bit over the edge, with a touch of crazy in the eyes. But the city has a way of doing that to you. Riggs was standing center completing the triangle.
They began talking amongst themselves after placing their order with the Pakistani donut clerks. They hadn’t noticed me, nobody does.
I was just sitting there, being nondescript. Thinking nothing, no worries, no thoughts of responsibility. Just me and my joe. Very Buddha.
It is of great coincidence that today is my friend Tyree’s birthday. Nov. 5th , The Day of Actuality.
The days meditation:
“The emptied mind is more prepared to see the Truth”
It has been 3 days since the great election of 2010. Across the nation “we the people”, stood up collectively and voiced our concerns by voting.
Some are taken back by the dominating percentage of Red States. I’ve heard that it hasn’t happen since 1938. Well even more befitting for the first President of Color. Semper Fi.
Some people though not politically minded were mindful of being in response to tragedy. Tragedy of the kind, that makes young men want to jump off the George, to meet the cold embrace of the reaper, in the waves, beneath.
But a Bishop of the Church in the Now, would leave the safety of his station. Put at risk his livelihood and risking being seen as spitting in the face of God. Stood up in faith and proclaimed himself as being Gay. A Bishop for Christ sake. Who says “they” shouldn’t get married, oh wait, Don’t ask , don’t tell. A bishops’ simple sacrifice of courage to save the young and misunderstood.
(God Bless, Bishop Bill Swilley)
With each sip of the joe my thoughts were drifting away. We we on alert after that bomb found on the planes earlier that week. it threw the department into a frenzy. More of a frenzy in the city than here in the Bronx. But still work.
Yeah, another sip, the joe was doing it’s magik. My mind was clearing. The tension was being released. i could unclench my teeth now, and loosen my shoes one my feet.
I ws just getting into a rhythm with the sipping, when he opened the doors to the shop. It was a customer. A Blatino male about 32. Wearing a Brown outer sweater. Brown with black and white stripping and a grey shoulder sport bag. Low Caesar hair cut, with about a week’s beard growth and glasses. He came into the shop smiling, as if thinking about something. But as he walked in he paused and his eyes widened slightly behind his tinted brown glasses.
He paused and looked at the three rookies that had taken slight notice of him, save for his entrance. he continued to walk in to the shop seemingly without pause. But I detected the pause.
He stepped into the ropes that comprised the line and then curiously began to smile broader. The smile became a grin. The grin turned to a chuckle. The chuckle roused the looks of the rookies, who noticed that he was laughing at them.
They began to check themselves out to see what was the matter. Mazerelli checked his hair. Braun checked his uniform. Riggs was just annoyed being laughed at.
Mazerelli looked towards the door and notice that Lt. Dinkins was walking thru the door. The customer turned towards him and started to laugh out loud now.
He said, “ I’m sorry but this is funny. What are the chances that I would walk in to actually find cops in the donut shop. It’s ironic, you three are like Mo, Larry and Curly. As for the Lt. he’s the ring leader.”
He had gotten it out, while waiting for them to catch up. The rookies and the Lt. had to laugh at the characterization. I too had to laugh at the stereotype. It was ironic.
We were disarmed, there was nothing out of the ordinary. We could relax and not have to worry about our own safety , we the enforcers of peace.
The customer went ahead and placed his order. Two Boston creme donuts and a cup of milk with ice. He had a few parting words with the Lieutenant, saying goodbye smiling joyfully.
He came close to me by the fixings counter, opening the the milks lid and taking a sip. He was still smiling. Now I knew him to be the fox that he was. He was beginning to smile like a thief or a politician, (same thing).
Then he spoke,” Life is funny, about how fate can change on a dime. See three cops in a donut shop is funny, but what’s even funnier is that I was surrounded by three cops and had a 1/4 ounce of weed on me. When I first walked in here my heart skipped, but what could I do I was already committed. If I had turned around and walked out I would have looked even more guilty. So all I could do is laugh to keep myself from crying.”
I responded saying,” Yeah that’s true, if they had suspected you’d be crying all right. All night in jail.” I couldn’t help but smile in response at the irony of his confession to me.
“Tell me about it” , he said. “You know I’m 41 y.o., positive and need the weed, but not the stress. It is aggravating that there’s no medical marijuana available here in New York. If I were in California, it wouldn’t be an issue. Anyway I thank God , nothing went down”.
He took a big bite of his donut and said goodbye and walked out the store. I saw him cross the street and begin to climb the stairs to the No. 4 train. I let him go I didn’t have the heart to arrest him. He wasn’t a threat, he wasn’t a dealer and most importantly he didn’t have any disrespect for the men in blue. He actually seemed like a happy soul, which only the energy of Scorpio could transform into darkness. My cup of joe kept me from being that dark cloud.
I smiled, and took another sip. This election season brought back another Cuomo into the governor’s office. Another Cuomo, the more things change the more they stay the same. I’m glad there’s another Cuomo in office maybe it’s a omen in the changing of fortunes.
However this Cuomo, has bigger issues to deal with. He has to revive a state who’s economy is in the crapper and a myriad of domestic issues. The biggest thing though is maintaining a sense of security in this newly felt terrorist climate.
Planes wiping out the twins, bombs in UPS packages and in the underwear of plane passengers. A bomb in a truck in Times Square. A terror threat every five minutes. We in the P.D. have our hands full at keeping the peace.
Should I really bother a citizen, that looks responsible, about carrying the contraband of a 1/4 ounce. They should have let prop 19 pass or at least expand the use medically.
In this age of terrorism maybe a little weed is the answer. To take the edge off. To slow things down a bit. To be able to have an appetite to feast, to overcome the knot of fear in the gut, that terrorism can instill.
As a cop if I had to choose Terrorism vs. Marijuana, I’d choose marijuana any day. Marijuana doesn’t threaten our infrastructure, our transportation. It doesn’t instill paranoia into the consciousness of our citizens. Neither does it make one group of citizens more suspect than others.
Terrorism has complicated everything from friendships to where to put a Mosque to getting a full body scan at the airport.
Give me the simple days of stopping someone for a Nickel bag vs. someone with a bag of C-4 any day.
Marijuana has never blown up a plane or caused a war. A nation never lost lives because of weed, they just got a good case of the munchies. Long live the Summer of ‘69.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Feliz Cumpleaños Mi Primo ... Libra
Fabutron
The Jihad of the Souls' Fire
Aires , Leo, Sagittarius = I am because my will , I understand.



Saturday, October 16, 2010
Regis-Renee. The Ruler Reborn under a Libran Sun

“Trust someone not for what they say, but because , like a bridge , you can venture out on them without fear of collapse” .
On the Day of Essential judgement. To day the number is &. Oct. 16, 1+6=7.
As with all of my Journeys I begin on the Monsoon. Sailing upon the back on my Manta, playing my flute . With the Nymphs in tow. Letting Neptune marvel at the power of Bliss. The Bliss of Love. Zeus Electirfied his trident. and blessed the crownde su Primo. Feroz the First GOD of the Thirteenth Generation X. G.O.D.= Guardian Of the Divine.
Yesterday the Magik within me manifesting itself in the form of the bond book form of Fabutron, written by Feroz. I was so overwhelmed I was tired. I went back to sleep, after a brief smile.
Later, my pride took over me and I put an entry onto my facebook page and then now on here. Oh don’t forget the numerous YouTube recordings that I made. But to top it all off ... I became an applicant for the S.I.B.L. , The Science , Industry and Business Library, a division of the NYC public Library.
I wasted no time putting up a profile. I wasted no time informing Facebook. I was / am a frenzy of activity. It’s the Libra energy that’s driving the forces within me.
Uranus is back in Libra as it was on the day of my birth. The other day was october 14, I was exactly 41yrs. 5 mos. 14 days Old on this day. More or less 5’s across the board, contrary to 10/10/ 2010. Well 5’s just mean that i’m half way there, I can settle for that, ATLEAST I’m NOT a THREE...Ugh ??... ROFL... well a three is good if YOU have to be a three. I mean I was a three.. but not for long.. . Anywho...
In my Chart this day (10/16/2010)is all about Uranus, which is the ever Mutable force (Gemini, Pisces, Virgo, Sagitaurius) a Emerald Gem that is core to the uniqueness within me.
That part of me that is always looking for change (Mercury, Neptune) ...looking for improvement (Virgo, Taurus) allowing the Rooster to Cry on this night where the moon is more than Half full. Bringing forth the Face of Bastet, The new face of Diana. Light winning out from the darkeness.
Applying Uranus Sextile Pluto
@ 10/16/2010 @8:33 pm
This transit suggests the emergence of movements for social reform and change. People are strongly motivated to change attitudes toward traditional values and they will crusade actively for this.
Uranus in sextile (within 2.7 degrees) with Neptune
The planetary energies flow together, open into new possibilities, new connections. This aspect gives a future oriented and idealistic individual, very aware of collective energies. This is a generational aspect, which many of your contemporaries will share with you.
You may feel a pull to the service of humanity at large. You are likely to be interested in mysticism and the occult. You may also be inclined to nervousness (especially if Uranus makes close aspects to the 'personal' planets in your chart).
You may feel some sense of confinement or restriction in the freedom to be who you want to be. Social ideals will strongly affect the expression of your individuality.
** Uranus harnassing the Piscean Energies of the Old Age. Neptune harnassing the Energies of a New Age. Generation X **
Feroz
Uranus in Libra (0° Lib 07'R) Uranus in the Seventh House
The following paragraph emphasized:Uranus in Libra (or the seventh house) gives an individual who is independent and original in the expression of artistic impulses and relationships. You are a lover of harmony and beauty, and you express this love in your own unique manner. You do not subscribe to a conventional sense of the aesthetic, but are always breaking new ground.
You are idealistic and philosophical, and you have a restless interest in new forms of stimulation. There can be problems with marriage in that partners may find you alternately affectionate and uninterested. You are likely to seek a rather unconventional relationship, which allows room for growth on both sides.
You need more space in relationship than most, and search for a partner who understands that, and has his or her own unique life perspective. You may also bring new concepts to the area of partnership. Part of your purpose in this life may be the transformation of the partnership energy into a new mode of being that can serve your own interest as well as enliven and invigorate your partner.
Pluto in Virgo (22° Vir 30'R) Pluto in the Seventh House
Pluto in the Seventh House (or sign) gives you a focus on forming close emotional attachments. You may have difficulties in marriage and partnerships; but there are also great rewards to be gained in this area. You may feel a compulsion to be liked by others. Conversely, you can also become involved in power struggles with partners.
You have a depth of passion within you that isn't obvious or recognized, and you may seek to project this power drive onto a relationship partner, rather than directly own up to it. You may therefore find yourself in relationship with dark or manipulative personality types, who may exhibit openly the tendencies you have yourself at a more hidden level.
You are likely to go through many changes in your relationship dynamic, as you come to understand more fully your inner process. You may exhibit strong attractions toward close involvement with another person, and simultaneously have fears regarding such attachments.
Time and moving through the fir! es of difficulties may lead you to a painful re-examination of your goals in these areas. Wisdom is required in the handling of close relationships in order to transform the partnership energy into a growing and conscious act of sharing, and to find your own inner strength independent of others around you.
Pluto in Virgo (or the sixth house) gives you an intense desire to be of service in the world. This desire can take the form of a compulsion to help others in a way that may not truly be appreciated by the intended beneficiaries. You are slightly obsessed with finding the purity inherent in human activity, and may well be a champion of the environmental movement, or exert yourself strenuously in your job or home setting.
You may also become intensely concerned and perhaps even chronically worried over health issues, or you may be apt to stress over organizational detail where the intention is to purify the function of the particular activity, but where attending to the details can become an end in itself. You may go through many profound changes of attitude in these areas, in order to learn how to be of actual service to yourself and others.
Creative outlets for your passion might be found in the helping professions, or in working on your own issues in such a way as to regenerate your values and life direction.
When you have transformed in these areas you can become a beacon for others to follow. By staying true to your own inner guidance system, you make it possible for others to also, and further the cause of a more self-aware and wisely functioning planetary society.
(by Henry Seltzer @ Astrograph)
Remembering that all this is transpiring under a Libra Sun with both Venus and Mars in Scorpio. These are the energis assialing my soul at the moment. However the Mercurial sole dispositor which rules my chart has things well in had allowing the Taurus to relax, and not work SO hard. Allowing the moon of the Bulls eye to finally shut. So ended the Age of Taurus.
Gemini goes to work to usher in the Age of Aquarius. As Pisces continues to flow forth toward the great spill of the Water Bearer.
The Sole Dispositor of your chart is Mercury in Gemini
(11° Gem 31')
The Sole Dispositor helps form your core personality, it ultimately rules all the other planets of your chart:
Mercury in Gemini gives a keen, alert and expressive mentality. You have great versatility, and can take up many different skills. You love variety in your life. You are constantly perceiving the world around you, and relaying your perceptions to your mind.
You approach mental pursuits in an intellectual rather than a practical way, and tend to prefer breadth in these matters to depth. You speak rapidly and well, and enjoy conversation with many different types of people. You are restless and can be prone to anxiety. Beware of stress to your nerves. It is beneficial for you when you cultivate periods of inner stillness.
Mercury in the Third House represents a strong mentality with an innate awareness of intellectual matters. You possess a keen, alert and expressive mind. You love variety in your life, and have great versatility along with a capacity to take up many different skills. You constantly perceive the world around you, and everything your awareness touches becomes a field for your intellectual attainment.
Your approach to mental pursuits is abstract, rather than practical, and also may be surface-oriented rather than deep and philosophical. You may appear restless or high-strung. You excel at written communication, and you also speak rapidly and well, and enjoy conversation with many different types of people.
The world of information and information-exchange affords you endless pleasure. An inveterate generalist, you profit from narrowing your focus and concentrating on a particular area. It also benefits you to you cultivate periods of inner stillness.
Yod, focal planet Moon.
A Red Moon. The Apis eyes of the Taurus Age cried as it was put to sleep.This Age of Pisces soon will join in the slumber.
You have a Yod planetary aspect pattern in your chart, also known as the 'finger of God'. “This is the Power of El Rey y La Reina de Espadas. The King and Queen of Spades.
The King and Queen represent the bringing forth of Manifestations into Reality. Self -Mastery.”
(Fabutron pg. 126).
This pattern consists of two different planets forming Inconjunct aspects of 150` to a third, or focal, point. Usually there will be a marked emphasis on the area of life represented by this focal point, which may be one planet, or two or more in conjunction. You may have physical or psychological problems associated with the expression of the energies of the focal planet or planets, creating a subtle form of tension in your life. Your lesson is to transform the expression of these energies along more positive lines.
The Moon in Aries gives an ardent nature with inclinations to impatience, independence and impulsiveness. With this placement, you have a high energy level. You also have a strong competitive streak, which, together with your attack first attitude, may conceal subtle feelings of insecurity. Your emotions are keenly felt, direct and spontaneous. You may have to guard against a quick temper. You should also guard against a tendency toward a too hasty reaction to situations, rather than a more carefully reasoned approach. You are most comfortable thinking of yourself as strongly independent with great physical daring and courage.
The Moon in the Second House represents being emotionally connected with one's values, with one's possessions, or the material things in this world. You may feel that your self-worth is connected with the physical manifestation of material wealth or material comfort. Your values are very important to you. You may feel compelled toward gaining material wealth or possessions when your emotional life is unfulfilling. You can also be quite generous. Your finances may fluctuate throughout your lifetime as you move through various emotional growth phases.
When you follow your gut feelings you are likely to be successful financially. You excel in occupations which deal with meeting the wants and needs of other people. You feel most comfortable and secure when your values and emotions are clearly defined and you can act upon them.
All bringing forth the Ascending Glory of the Piscean Age of Christ manifesting as my Pisces Rising (Skin), The Glory of a Divine Age soon past. Generation X.
The Rising Sign is the mask shown to others, also the physical appearance.People with Pisces rising are idealistic and sensitive. Your ruling planet is Neptune, also Jupiter. With this ascendant you are friendly and likable, yet also can be very moody and introspective, and not entirely at home in the world. Your appearance is delicate, with an ethereal quality suggesting contact with other dimensions of reality.
Pisces is a watery sign, concerned with subtle emotions and secret mystical depths. You are dreamy and full of imagination, and are easily influenced by everything around you. You also have an artistic temperament with which to express these feelings. You can be strong when necessary, but you may have a hard time making a decision. At your best you are truly compassionate, and operate at the level of service, love and understanding of mankind.
Mercury in strong square (within 0.1 degrees) with Ascendant
The planetary energies conflict; internal and creative tensions bring rich rewards through effort over time. This conjunction gives a personality who values mental pursuits and communication highly.
You have a need to connect with other people. Your attention is so much on communicating with others you may constantly worry about how you are coming across, and this may interfere with good communication with other people.
You are quick-witted and glib, and may also be nervous and high-strung. You should beware of a tendency to dominate any conversation you enter into.
Your pride in your mental abilities and education may overshadow your ability to hear other people. You may turn to writing or public speaking as a way to share your enthusiasm for your own ideas. You are in essence an independent thinker with your own way of looking at things, and you may be inspired and even visionary in your outlook.
Mars in square (within 3.6 degrees) with Ascendant
The planetary energies conflict; internal and creative tensions bring rich rewards through effort over time. This aspect gives a rash personality with a quick temper. You lack patience and tend to be argumentative. You are restless and have a forceful drive, which can lead you to accomplish great things, if properly harnessed. You are likely to possess a wiry and spare physique. You are also excitable, tend to run risks, and can be opinionated.
You are daring and have great physical vitality and stamina. You can definitely "hold your own" in a dispute. You are sometimes hard to talk with, seeming to take your own position at the expense of others, and you should beware of abrasive behavior towards them, such as bragging or pushing yourself too much. You usually mean well, and need to temper your physical drive with calmness and judgment.
Mars in Sagittarius (14° Sag 59'R) Mars in the Ninth House
Sagittarius the sign of the Playboy or the House Boy. The following paragraph emphasized: Mars in Sagittarius (or the ninth house) gives a friendly and optimistic nature. You are likely to lead a physically active life, and are fond of sports and gambling. You are idealistic, outspoken and honest with your opinions. You are also likely to be spontaneous and even a bit impulsive. You can be scattered in the application of your energies, and it will perhaps benefit you to work at becoming more reliable.
You have a great propensity for learning. Your energy is most naturally invested in adventures of the higher mind: travel, education, perhaps publishing. You like many different pursuits, and have a kind of haphazard way of going about things that can get you into trouble.
You may tend to miss the details, by fixing your gaze on "the big picture." You also can be dogmatic at times, when you get too carried away with your own point of view. You profit by learning to slow down your enthusiasm and focus your concentration on reachable goals.
So Long story short, Mars is now trasversing thru Libra with all of this Scorpian influence. Bringing great sexual energy into the individual, but Virgo harnasses that energy purifies it and transmutes it ot mental energy allowing me to Write.
That’s the beauty of the influence of Saturn on Taurus.Saturn is now resting in Libra (10/16/2010). This Libra represents the Balance of forces within my Soul. The Ying and the Yang. The Introvert and the Extravert. The male and the Female.
The Jihad of the Dignified Soul vs.The Free Spirit was settled within the Heart of The Golden Apis Bull. Feroz was bridled by the knowledge of the power of Envy upon one’s soul and the things that it along with Greed can accomplish despite itself. Reflecting and understanding that though Envy wasn’t common to his nature. He marveled at it’s creation and was Thankful.
The Apis Bull rested upon a bed of Lillys and Potporri. Straw and Roses petals dispersed. Closing it’s Emerald Eyes. Comforted now by the fact that he could now see thru the Darkness.
The Moon and Neptune are currently flowing thru Aquarius on this day, of more Lunar light than darkness.
Flowing Upstream of the Aquarian flow, an Angel saw a Pheonix and a Manta , disappear into folds of the Vase and disappeared in the mind of the Bull. As ,Then, he once again rose and became part of the Tapestry of Universal Consciousness.
Where my Jupiter was once in Virgo on my b-birth, today it is in Pisces. Uranus once in Libra, today in Pisces as well. Earth and Air Both transmuting into Water.
Where my Neptune in Scorpio transmutes into a Aquarian persona, the Moon in Aries soon gives chase changing its flame for flow. Water and Fire envy’s the Air.

My Taurus Sun acclimates itself to the Rays of Libra. So my Venus in Aries and Mars in Sagittarius are matched under this Libra sky under Scorpio.
Mercury stays balanced in it’s element both as Sole dispositor of my chart and on this day in the Air sign of Libra.
Pluto which was in my Virgo is today in Capricorn. Pluto was last in capricorn from 1762-1778. this was the time of the American declaration of Indepedence, the Boston tea party, watt’s invention of the steam engine and the riegn of lousiXVI and mary Antoinette. The industrial reveloution was in full swing. The rigidity of many governments of the time led to rebellions and uprisings in later years.
On a personal level , this position gives perseverence, ambition, efficiency in organizing and managerial ability. Those who have Pluto in Capricorn are conservative , materialistic, and spiritually strong. So the Bull (pluto in virgo) goes from technical development to Evolution within Gemini (pluto in Capricorn).
[ March & McEvers ]
I have taken on an Aquarius Spirit., part of the Aquarian flow that is Universal Consciousness. I was Further blessed today with two new members of my Family. Isabel coaxed me into becoming the adoptive father of two kittens. The Duel spirits of the Moon. For one is All Black (The New Moon) , the Other is a Grayish Tabby (The Moons transitions to full).
I Fell in Love with them. I think Isabel knew that would happen. Libra has brought life into the home of a Taurus. Now the Bull doen’t feel so lonely, a slight of being Misunderstood.

Monday, August 16, 2010
What do Words mean 2U ?

I asked a Friend, Inkera that very same question. His sharply gruff scorpian response was, " They don't mean shit ". Namaste.
I disagree, however. I'm keenly aware of the motivation, the associated emotions that fires this sentiment. I just can't spring from that premise, that supposition., diving into a spiked pool.
As I turned to his roommate Dai Dai, who had just entered the apartment during our conversation. “So what do you think?” I asked. “About what”, he said apprehensively , being in the dark about the origin of our conversation.
“What do words , mean 2 U ?” I said , as if demanding an answer, daring him to punk out. Trigga (Inkera) turned saying, “Yes Dai Dai, the oracle has spoken”, campy campy.
“Things Unspoken”, he said sitting down on the couch. Also an excellent premise. I could see the needle pointing true North, with no doubling back. However my premise is on a different azimuth.
My answer is that words mean Everything.
Why , because words have meaning, many however make a talent of obscuring their meanings, either by intent or because of ignorance. Forgetting that all words have a resonance.
Love , Hate, God ... all these words have different vibes that goes off when an individual hears these words in combination of sentence. They react negatively when those words are not known, or familiar. The word Jargon for instance means vocabulary peculiar to a particular profession.
Astrology has it’s own particular jargon. Utilizing the planets and symbols to describe emotions. An ancient craft some liken to witchcraft, no less than Christ on the water. But that’s a miracle. You would call it the Miracle of the Messiah. I would concur.
Words are so plentiful that they have figured out how to say the same thing on another longitude and latitude on this globe. It’s called languages, something else to fuck up,” getting to know fuckin You”. God Damn it.
I’m a Taurus Earth Rooster, more jargon. I say that to say , words deserve the truth of their meaning, barring inflection. Allah, Christ, Buddha, Jehovah, Isis, Osiris, , Dios, Amen all mean God. God is Truth, there’s innocence in Truth. For it is with truth that one can stab the heart, seize the brain and pierce the soul with one blow.
The Rooster cries the truth. Hopefully how he sees the truth, is in accordance with how the rest of the world sees him in it. That serves for both the truth seer and the truth speaker, like one trying to sell a product that was invented by the seller. Belief in one’s products and oneself requires truth. So a man believes , so a man is.
It is with words that man forms Nations. Nations then forming alliances. All with assurances of Faith. The word faith is paradoxically insidious for it’s nature is contrary. It bespeaks confidence in another , in particular a deity. Religious Faith.
Faith speaks confidence, yet breeds mistrust. Faith’s waters are very still, few have the temerity to skate across the surface. It’s that lack of faith in oneself, but not always just faith in-self. We must also extend faith to one another. Dole it out like a placebo until the time to bring the drug to market, FDA approved.
For all of the many opportunities that conversations employ. It’s amazing that people can actually come together with the same mind set to carryout a plan, build a business, learn at school or get a job.
No other form of communication better represents you than the choice of words that radiate from your own self representing tongue. All other words are just confirmation.
Words of course are just half of the equation when determining another’s character. Deeds are usually the proof in the pudding for the words that are spoken. So if there’s heart in your words, you find the courage for your deeds. Words + Deeds = Truth .
Words are everything to me. They turn a page into a different time and place. They turn people’s faces either blue or green. They can moderate temperature, either hot or cold. They can make things tangible or not. In a minute over a trillion words are resonating .
Speaking of resonating, see if these words resonate within:
“Keep your Words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them”.
Words can be an inspiration, they can be a, Kick-Ass !!
Feroz
Thursday, April 1, 2010
The Ephiphany of an April Fool
April 1st, 2010 - The Day of Diginity. Today I became intimately aware of the benevolent malevolence of the functioning universe and was amused in comfort that it truly existed. It's the evil that keeps the "Good" on the straight and narrow. I'm going to tell you that I have been tested in these past few days leading up to today. The major players in the Heavens now are Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus all in T square to Pluto. What does all this mean. Trouble in a hand basket rather a shopping cart. But it all comes down to the Disciplined vs. the Impulsive.
See that Void is always prevelant. Today's meditation : "As we play on violins, guitars, and pianos, so the Universe plays on Us", the Divine US. I was being tested in how I would transform a bad situation into one that's more favorable. By appling some originality to structure and living in faith to reap in abundance or atleast to breakeven. I didn't even realize it was a test so masterly crafted was my trial that I didn't divine the portent of the test and the timing of it until the last trail unveiled itself. Cancer in this case is a naughty nurse. I had to say no.
Maturity is a sobering thing. A little dry on the surface, arid infact. Then there's that juicy inner core and you know that the sacrifice and patience was all worth it. From Forty to Fourteen and back. Astrology keeps mystifying me. I'm eager to learn the Astronomy side of this careerfield for a clearer picture, yet even from where I stand the picture unfolds with clarity as long as you pay attention.
My sister Nalani is turning 35 today, April 2nd. The mediation: "By keeping alive to what is happening we live in the present". It's a call to consciousness. A call to responsibility of self, and those things that need to be attended to to endure one's growth, ones' evolution.
Birds fly... Fish swim... Man evolves
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Traveling the Void- God is with Us
Ode to "God is with Us" ( Emanuel )
I'm sitting in the hospital bed at 2:02 in the am and I have You on the Brain. It's feb 25 a little more than twenty years since we first met. It may have been the first time that I told you that I loved you. Curse the words.
I have the abitily of keen insight into an indiviual. It's not up for debate, it exists. Finally though that insight has come home to roost and home has never felt so warm.
There were alot of things about you Emanuel that attracted me to you. You were my First. They say you Never forget your first. Oh boy, truer words have never been spoken.
You were the first man that I loved.
The first man that I Trusted.
The first man that I felt I could speak my Heart to.
The first person that I could admire from close.
You had a disiplined mind... I wonder how he does that?
Anywho.. were's the ice cream
The most endearing part was that you were into Me. I had never had someone so interested in me before. Never had someone think that " wanting to become an an astronaut was cool, not nerdy"
Never had someone that believed in me with encouragement.
Someone that understood the man that I wanted to become. Not someone great, just someone that I could be Proud of. (crying a bit)
All this I saw in your heart, all this I felt in your love and unsolicited help. All this made me breathe easier.
Then life got in the way. The cotton candy clouds that made up our world, gave way to the cumulus clouds of the everyday. Setting us into the storm patterns that would test that love.
It all began with your responsiblites and your inability to allow Love to temper your tongue.
Your tongue which first began to hurt, then sting, then whip, then lash. Until I was able to lash myself more effectively than the master, for I knew where all the demons lied.
Where sitting in a jail cell was a scene of my life that I would have never pictured. A hell , an Angels wings had been clipped. Fear caused me to graciously recount my steps until I could feel the warmth of the sun on my back again and know that God is with me.
That journey lasted from '90-'03, when I remembered that we are judged by the company that we keep. I was lacking in company of my suiting. It was time to molt let the pestilence fall away like the leaves awaiting a renewed spring day.
In '04 I was hatched again and the life that emerged wasn't as majestic as the eagle before. It was unsightly, awkward, frail and didn't look like it could survive a summers day let alone a winters nap.
I had lost my work the source of my independence. My health insurance, my source of the ability to heal. Friends to call near for a source of support. I
called upon that cloud, he offered a last vestige of support under that wing.
Sympatheic as that cloud was. The bird was no longer the same, niether was the interest. It (the cloud) , You were a tail feather left over from the molting, curious that it should stay, being reborn and all.
The tailfeather, you, were wilting and I couldn't quite get it out,so unmindfully I stuck another one (guy) in it's place. One though beautiful and comely, one ultimately more virulent in nature.
Remembering the spirit that is me. I bought an object more expressive of my nature, 1200cc's worth. Then I powered down to Florida to just be able to breathe again.
I was able to take stock in that which was me. But my original nest kept calling me back home. Home where the air is toxic to the spirit, harmful to the soul. Home that will turn a young man to dust before his story could be told.
When my puppy died under that Florida sky, Elmocito. The last gift that the cloud, You could bestow. I knew it was time to test my renewed lungs under those toxic clouds. "Why complain about the air when there's nothing else to breathe".
A bird must complain for the sky is where we live. " Birds must fly, fish must swim, man must..." **
My plummage was coming in beautifully, my frame constantly tested under it's weight, something to work on.
By the time I returned that new tail feather (guy) released it's poison into my artieral flow and said " now bitch, Grow".
The city stole my ride and that tail feather never stopped feeding poison. I was under the influence of dark spirits. In a realm unfamiliar to those that live with the dawn. Subjected to severe recriminations - sacrificed willingly. For sometimes even the light of ones own spirit must be eclipsed, in order to divine the realm of the shadow. I had to fully understand, the ashes from which a Pheonix must be reborn.
I survived. I had a project something greater than myself and nothing was going to get between it and me.
My eyes became more Feral, my will became more impervious. My heart galvinized itself to the barbs, the needles, the hooks, the stabs, those things that could harm both seen and unseen.
It's 4:19 am I just got another transfusion, thank god for Dr. Drew may he rest in peace.
I've tried to reach out to the cloud,you, but besides it's form, nothing much was recognizable. I'd rather remember what was.
Since being in the hospital I've plucked out both tail feathers, they've withered againgst the outslaught of the souls inferno that lays beneath the skin.
The plummage is growing in unhampered now and that awkward bird that once resembled a chicken is now taking on a Pheonix's gait.
I can't spit fire yet or sing the pheonix's song, nor can I fly though I test my wings daily. But I know that I am content with my being. I am a creature of myth, a part of the stars. I am here to join the fight I am here to clear the Fuckin Air , because it is offensive to my sight. That's what complaining will get you.
As for those two tail feathers, well the new one I buried deep within the Earth, it has a few half lives to go through before it can return.
Interestingly Enuff my nurse Irina O., Russian immigrant is a Cancer, a nuturer. God is with us. I told her under tears that writing this has made me happy, she almost came to tears herself. It's 4:47am she's a cancer born 6/28/1985.
It's interesting because the new tail feather was a Cancer, the old one a Virgo. Both on either cusp of Leo. I was inhaling sulfur at the beginning and the end of the burn.
As for that old tail feather, You, Emanuel. I've released it to the atmosphere below and hope that it finds that cloud that I left behind not so long ago. Maybe that cloud will find some restorive change. Maybe it will understand, why it was my first love.
It was a cosmic thing. Don't look down, look up.The Universe is within your sights.
"Love hath reason, that reason doth not know".
I found my gift in the void. The gift that would provide me the Peace that I would find in the work that I do. The peace matched the happiness (gaiety) that was naturally mine.
I am contented. I am satisfied and fulfilled. This is the Peace and Happiness one finds, "when you walk through the storm".
Remember keep your head up high, for "God is with Us".
Vaya Con Dios.
Feroz
**The Secret Language of Birthdays
Monday, March 1, 2010
Pisces please navigate the Void, the Abyss
There's a Void within Us.
Inexplicable though it maybe, it exists.
Nature abhors a void.
The void is pervasive to the nature of man. It strikes like an ache that's felt but unlocated. Causing children distress, tantrums unchecked. Causing our youth to rebel, putting them into a frenzy of action that tests the discipline ingrained.
It acts like a spatial anomoly, felt yet unseen. When you reach its event horizon you feel its pull. Clear and present danger. Careful the undertow might pull you in. Be afraid my children, "for God has troubled the Water".
A disciplined mind senses it's presence and begins to find a way to map the void. An irresponsible mind tries to ignore it.
An irresponsible mind runs from it thinking they'll find happiness and freedom the further they run. A disciplined mind knows that it follows you because it's tethered.
Not without the pain of experimentation both the disciplined mind and the irresponsible begin to actively engage the void. Remember it's pervasive. It's also cunning. The predator has teeth and it pangs, it pangs for the attention that it seeks from it's host. "I am here, I am with you, I will not be ignored"
The predator knows what it "wants". I want to have fun. I want to play. I want drink, drugs, sex, money, a nigger, a bitch. I want to be alone. Etc.
The trap is set for both the disciplined mind and the irresponsible. Success is measured by the navigation. Sometimes it's measured by shear luck. Such is the nature of the beast.
The void grows with you as you grow. It can guide your dreams and influence your passions. It has power over - it adds power, to your life. The void can make you weep. It can make you sing. It can make you invincible, it can make you weak. Yet when completely sensed by your spirit, the unseen reveals itself to your sight. It is dangerous and benign. You understand it's magnitude.
To be absolutely truthful it's meant as a gift. The gift is different for everyone. Means something different to everyone.
It's hope lies within you. Only you have the key. Only you can answer the call of the wild. Only you can tame the beast or be devoured by it.
Are you disciplined or are you irresponsible?
To the Neophytes of Terra I say this: your best defense against the beast lies in the words of your elders. Which elders? Anyone that seems to have the riens on thier life.
As a youth, a boy. I was fortunate enuff to be raised in the company of my Great Grand mother. Not many have that privelege. When I took my first breath my Grandma Elsie already was working on her 55th rotation. Her friends equally so.
There was ages old wisdom amoungst these carribean women. Secrets seemingly as old as time to the ears of a seven year old watching them covort over a hot summers grill, a boatride, a picnic, a birthday party, a stint at the salon.
Words of wisdom that rang true from thier mouths because the stories they told were lifes stories. The jokes they told, yes were meant to make them laugh but they laughed all the harded because the things they joked about were true. That's when a saavy seven year old started to understand the concept of irony. That things aren't always as they appear. Wisdom imparted, discplined instilled.
"A childs place is to be seen, not heard", many times that was told to me. I never resented it, I obeyed. A discplined child learns that, it doesn't mean you can't ask a question from time to time. Because from time to time the elders would gage if the answer was appropriate enuff for your ears. They didn't forget that you were there. Remember: "sit up, stop biting your nails".
When they had to get rid of you because the conversation would get to deep all of a sudden, " go fetch grandma a Guiness stout" would be asked and I'd go skipping away because I wanted to be useful. They spoke thier secrets in peace. Innocense protected.
By the time I was fourteen, I was thirty because of thier exposure. That's the gift of the elders.
A closed mouth and an open ear can reveal many treasures that money can't provide. Jewels of wisdom.
Secrets to the Void within our soul.
The trap is set. A new generation arrives. A predator awaiting each one lurking in the tall Serengetti grasses. The feast is about to begin. It is Darwinism at it's best.
Who survives? It's simple, those that know not to provide the petulant beast what it wants, but to nuture it with what it "needs". What you need. Discipline.
When God in you feels that your listening, he whispers. When ignored he screams, growls, he bites. Such is the void. You hurt.
The pain comes in many forms. Worry, anger, hatred, addiction of all forms, antisocialism, envy. Let's just say people that turn the party ugly.
When you learn to listen to the universe when it whispers to your soul. You may not get the order right at first but atleast you nuture the pang.
From time to time even the discplined mind gets frustrated. For the Void is fastidious and it wants what it wants. But as you mature you understand that all wants can not be fulfilled or met and you must be content with what you need.
When you find that contentment, whether it be through creating a family, finding work that fulfills you, simply getting inline with the rhythm of the universe, you are cleansed with satisfaction everyday. Peace and happiness await you like a shield against the trials of life. You smile easier, laugh harder, health is restored. Even your occassional bad habits aren't so much a malady.
You step into the fresh spring air and look back at the winters blizzard and say, " Good God, what the Hell was that, that I went through". Smiling, knowing that though not unscathed, you survived. The Void has been crossed. The Perfect Storm has been weathered.
You stop, gather yourself. Weep not for what has been lost. Be it friends, money, time or health. For you are at Peace, you are content. Satisfaction fills you and Paradise lies within.
Some survive the onslaught of the void with a few licks. Some are forever paralyzed by it and perish. Some get through it without ever quite understanding it's nature. Few look back at it and smile because they know they are forever changed for the better by it.
My journey through life was arduous not because of my fear of the Void, I hate fear. But because I saw the power of the void, it's strength. I mapped it time and again. Ever fickle was it's design.
When I approached the event horizon it seemed like the best rollercoaster ride that I'd ever have. It scared me to death, my heart beat harder. It may have even skipped a beat. I aimed for the center and held on tight to the controls of my Space shuttle. Maximum shields Mr. Zulu, Spock I want a play by play. O'Hura release the communications bouy and alert Starfleet. Mr. Chekov prepare for the wakes. And Bones get prepared for casualties.
Jim I'm just an ole country doctor.
Well then replicate a reserve batch of courage with a dose of faith and may God protect our souls. We're going in.
When I emerged, I had Astrology as my map and writing as my work. Fabutron was my purpose and I was set on my course. The child in me hasn't died, he steering my ship at fourteen.
I am content, happy. It's 4:16 am Feb 28,2010. I'm lying in Lenox Hill hospital on my iPhone typing. Aren't these amazing times in which we live.
We are on the cusp of the Age of Aquarius open the window let the sun shine in.